This is going to be a pretty short post. Simply because I cannot remember much about the event. Why? Because it is about Exercise Warrior. One of the dreaded exercise in SAF among many others. 

Exercise Warrior was (I think it's shorter now.) a 9 day mission exercise. 9 days in the jungle. Something that none of us has ever been through. Imagine 9 days with minimal rest, mission after mission on Taiwanese terrain. It is already hard to survive 5 days of office hour work, that too with proper 8 hours sleep every night yet by Wednesday we will already be dreading the week. This is 9 days doing something we were trained to do but not something that comes naturally in our daily civilian life. Somewhere between the 4th day, my mind and body was already on auto-pilot mode and I could not remember anything. It was just, weary bodies, sleepy eyes and brains going on auto-pilot, mission after mission.

It was particularly dreading because army missions are confusing to me. They try to make it as systematic as possible but the terrain, time and fatigue always make it difficult. And also, the idea of 9 days in the jungle. 9 days of combat ration. I wonder how we were going to clear our bowels.

But... but.... on the 4th or 5th day, we would be having a “technical break”. So I guess, that was something we could all look forward to. More on the “technical break” later in this post. 

Day 1, we moved off to the training area sometime after lunch. Well technically that was already half day gone so I was grateful. I was assigned to be the section commander for the first mission. Honestly I didn't know that the “mission” has already started once we moved off from camp. 

We reached the training area in the late afternoon and our platoon proceeded to “harbour” in a particular area. Harbour means, we will settle at the area for the night with routine alert and sentry duties, protecting the area and protecting ourselves. We were all positioned by our platoon commander and my position overlooked a hill slope with a wonderful view of the mountains. We were all assigned individual positions quite a distant from the next man. So we were pretty much alone the whole night. 

Yes, a whole night alone in the cold winter Taiwan hills. I had my jacket and gloves on, blanketing myself with my sleeping bag but it was really cold. It wasn't freezing cold but cold enough for a boy from the tropics. Sometime around midnight, our platoon sergeant walked to everyone of us individually to check that we were all ok and reminded us to keep warm. He told us that it is very important because somehow, that night, the weather was colder than normal. It was 9 degrees celsius. 

I couldn't take it but I endured. Then I remembered, I brought this ointment from home. It was called “Minyak Hijau” or green oil. It's an ointment for muscle aches but I remember at that time maybe I can use it because it gives off a heaty effect. Like tiger balm oil or salonpas. But much hotter.

So in the dark, in the cold, I looked for the oil. I took off my jacket, unbuttoned my shirt and pants so that I can apply the ointment on my body and especially legs. Unscrewed the bottle and then there was this rubber stopper beneath the cap. It is especially hard to dislodge that rubber cap when it is a new bottle. So I tried and tried, getting colder as I took more time. And then..... it came off with a pop and I spilled the oil onto my stomach, groin and legs. I looked in horror as half of the bottle has spilt. At first it was a horror of wastage, and then it was a horror of the heat creeping in. 5 minutes ago I was shivering in the cold. Now I was biting my lips and clenching my teeth to fight the heat. It was funny as since I was alone, I took off my uniform and lowered my pants to allow the cold Taiwan night weather to cool me down. Somehow it tire me out and i put my clothes, and jacket on and fell asleep all the way till morning when someone woke me up. They told me there was an earthquake that night and I slept through it. I was quite disappointed not to be able to feel and experience the quake. 

Next morning, we moved off for our first attack. As I said before, I thought the mission started then. We will have a briefing and all. But no, the mission started when we moved off from camp. None of my section mates know our roles or tactics because I didn't brief them. I really thought we were going to do it then. My PC was very angry and we got scared. I told him I will brief them along the go. Shitty thing was, my section was the point section meaning I had to lead the whole platoon to the assault area. It was very stressful navigating the walk that I didn't plan for. I will not forget this. It was very very stressful. It's not like we were walking along a Singapore's nature reserve park connector. This was in a foreign country and I had no idea where we were and where we were going. 

Maybe it was the stress of walking up and down the line of soldiers briefing them on their tasks yet at the same time navigating the route, my legs failed for the first (luckily the only) time in my life. I could still walk but somehow I could not climb. Every slope, my legs just could not push my body up. It was a strange feeling not to be able to feel your legs pushing you uphill. I kept falling and dropping that the people behind me had to push me up every time. It was weird because I knew my body was not tired (yet). I just could not feel my legs. 

Anyway the mission went on and we completed it. I was screaming orders to my men during the attack and the reorganisation after the attack. My PC said I was a “garang” commander. But really in my head then was, I was tired pulling my legs along the walk and I wanted to get this mission over and done with. I had no sense of belonging towards the mission at all. It was just fatigue and please get it done as soon as possible. That was my only mission as a section commander for Exercise Warrior because everyone of us will take turn to lead a mission each. I guess, leading the first mission would be better than the last mission.

After that, it was all blank. Auto-pilot. 

I actually took like a 30 minutes break after the last sentence to see if I can remember anything. Yup. Nothing. It was all blank. 

And then on the 4th day, we had a “technical break”.

A technical break in the army is when all of us have a real break. A tactical break means we will all still be in soldier mode with routined sentry and watch duties while others take a break. But a technical break means we don't have to be in tactical mode at all.

So it was a half day technical break. Something that we all looked forward to. On this day we changed our clothes, had powder baths, cleaned the camo from our faces. Some brought facial wash. Best thing was, we had packed meals. Though it was still camp food, but it was still nice fresh cooked meals. We had fruits and some chocolates. And also, we were told that the exercise will be cut short from 9 days to 8 days. Just one day but it was good enough for us. I cannot remember why though. I heard it was due to some typhoon warning or earthquake or just simply administrative matters.

We also took this time to rest our legs, chatted, a short nap and took photos.

We rested for half a day at this place. It was an orange plantation with some bamboo vegetation. We have no idea who the owner of the plantation is. When we came to the place, the trees were full of oranges. But when we left...... I don't think I can say much but technical break had sweet memories. 

After that, it was blank again. I cannot remember anything. I do remember some faces in my head though. Exercise Warrior was the last exercise of our stint in SISPEC. This was the final opportunity for people to “shine and show their potential”. At the end the whole course, there will be a presentation to the outstanding trainee. Notable trainee will be given the “Silver Bayonet Award” while the top trainee will be given the “Gold Bayonet”. Personally I did not bother about all these. I just want to get NS done quickly without any baggages or extra duties. But there were people who were really into this and tried very hard to impress. It was so weird. The “wayang” was too obvious that it became quite yucky to see. But that's how things work in this world right?

And that is all that I can remember. I don't even remember when we got back to Puwei Camp or what we did. I guess it was all administrative stuff. Clean up and rest and more cleaning and getting ready to leave the camp. Oh now that I said it, I remember people buying street food from vendors outside the camp. It was funny. They couldn't see the vendors behind the wall. But they just shout out the order. In Mandarin. Then they would throw the money over the wall which was about only 3 metres high and the vendor would then throw the food over the wall to the guy within the camp walls. I don't know what they ordered. Looked like some fried snacks. 

Yes that is pretty much it. 

Next week : R & R

​

First exercise in Taiwan. Navigation exercise called Exercise Longstride. 

I googled about it recently and it is said that it is a 3 days 2 nights exercise. Though I don't remember the exact days and dates, I don't remember it being that short. Mine was 5 days 4 night. Or rather it was 4.5 days with the 5th day being a half day. Maybe I got it wrong but I really don't remember it being a short 3 days.

Early morning and we took a truck to the navigation area. We took a truck that was called a 2 and half tonner. It was just slightly smaller than a 3 tonne truck in Singapore. The 3 tonner is already phased out by the current bigger 5 tonner.

We already have the map of the navigation area. It was a topographical map so there weren't much civilian details on the map. But it was good enough for us to navigate. What annoyed me was, I still had no idea where our PuWei camp was. My PC just said that Taiwan is very big. He pointed the navigation area map to us and said our camp is “down here”. He pointed his finger into the air below the map. 

The truck moved on as I looked at the Taiwanese countryside. I was apprehensive and worried and already missing home. Most of us were excited when we passed by booths that sells betel leaves and nuts. There were ladies in sexy attire sitting in the booths selling them. I was told that Taiwanese like to chew on betel nuts and leaves and these booths are by the roadside to be sold to drivers on long drives. These ladies were called “Pinang Girls”. Then I realised that Pinang is also the Malay word for betel. Sorry no photos of these ladies. You can google. I just did as I typed this to see whether they are still around.

We reached the starting point. It was quite a sight. We were surrounded by mountains. Well technically they were hills but for us they were all higher than Bukit Timah so we called them mountains. 

From the starting point, we had to look for our checkpoints which will slowly lead us back to the end point of the exercise and we have to reach it within 4 and a half days. We were all separated into groups of 4 and all groups had different checkpoint allocations. We might bump into each other but no 2 groups will have the same order of checkpoints. Warrant Sim (if you remember me mentioning him in the earlier post) said, “head to the big Buddha”. The big Buddha will be near or endpoint. But he said it in an almost literal and spiritual manner as we separated and dispersed into the forest. Cool. 

The walk was scary as we trudged along an unknown forest. We are not talking about Singapore nature reserves where we are bound to hit some roads or civilisations. This is a foreign forest to us. But we soon found the pattern of the forest. We try to walk along the ridges of the mountains and skirt along plantations so that we will feel safer in case we get lost. There were also tracks along the higher ridges compared to the lower ground. Apparently the locals like to set up their plantations on higher ground. The forest were also less dense than our tropical rainforest and it was easier to walk through. Once we reached higher ground, we realise it wasn't as scary as we thought. There were a lot of plantations and tracks. Most of them oranges and betel plantations. Once in a while we will spot tea plantations. The view was also nicer on high ground where the hills looked less imposing and more scenic.

A day's adventure soon came to end. Night fell and we had to look for a place to spend the night. We all had sleeping bags with us and we can sleep anywhere in the forests but it was cold. We had parka jackets too. We tried resting on the mountain ridge but most of it were to narrow. They were so narrow like a one man's width and we had to walk in a line with steep slopes on both sides. (There was once when all 4 of us slipped down a a steep slope and we slid down unable to stop all the way down to the bottom. We tried grabbing onto vines and roots and branches and tree trunks but we couldn't. So you can imagine how steep it was. We only stopped when we were at the bottom and we had to climb up again.) Plus it was really cold at night. We tried to rest on the slopes but they were to steep. It was really a long walk just to find a suitable place to rest for the night. I remember this. It was quite stressful as it was dark and cold. Legs weary and eyes sleepy.

Then, we saw a shed. It was like those farm sheds. We went to have a look. There was no one there. We wondered if the owner would find us and charge us for trespassing. We thought for a while and decided to give it a rest. If the owner comes, we will just leave. At least we have a few hours away from the cold.

It was a peaceful sleep and no one disturbed us. We woke up in the morning feeling refreshed and moved on with our walk. When the light came in the morning, we found out that the shed was used to store oranges. We never felt so tempted to eat oranges before until that day. I myself am not a fan of oranges. But we respected the place and its owner for providing us shelter so we left the place as it is.

The day moved on pretty much like the day before. Once in a while we will bump into other groups and we exchanged information. We completed our checkpoints and looked for a place to sleep that night. With the previous night's experience, we looked for a similar shed. We kind of know how the terrain is like by now and which areas might have plantations and sheds. 

Day 3 was the same too. More walks. On this day, on one of the mountains, we saw the big Buddha in the distance. We were happy and were very sure that we will reach the end point before day 5.

As we headed southwards towards the end point, we noticed even more "civilisation". There were more houses, buildings, sheds and roads. 

One moment that I cannot forget is; we were bashing through the trees and we heard sounds like some music and chant. That part of the forest was dense so we couldn't make out how far that sound was. We just continued walking and at this particular part, we bashed through some dense trees and it opened like a curtain where we faced a clearing. There was where the music and chant came from. We came head on to a burial ceremony and the grave hole was just behind the “curtain” tree. The group mate who was in front almost fell into the freshly dug hole. I kid you not. We were really facing it. We were shocked, the funeral procession was shocked to see us appearing behind the trees. They stopped playing and looked at us. It was awkward. Especially when they were literally lowering the coffin into the grave. Thinking back now, it was funny. We apologised, skirted around the grave hole and walked while this procession and grieving family members just stopped their business (including crying) and looked at us in silence as we walked away.

That night as we looked for a place to sleep again, we walked through a village. This time it wasn't just a plantation but a real village with people. The children called us “Ah Ping Ke” as we walked past their homes. Some of the residents even invited us to spend the night at their houses. It was a nice gesture but we were told to not accept their offer. 

One group walked past us and said they were from a house who served them grilled duck. They said another group is in one of the house to spend the night. How true were these. I have no idea. 

By now, we were “experienced” enough to locate sheds to sleep in.

Day 4. We completed our checkpoints just before noon. The endpoint was nearby and we were at the big buddha already. There were a set of time for the trucks to ferry us back to camp. Maybe about 3 trips a day. Something like one in the morning, noon and late afternoon. We definitely could catch the noon ferry but we decided to rest and soak the atmosphere a bit more. Plus we knew that if we were to be back in camp before night time, we would not be able to rest. Surely we would be asked to do “Sai Kang” (Literally means shit hole. In the army, sai kang means labour work that everyone dread. Like clean toilets or wash jerry cans or carry things or whatever.)

So we found a good spot where we rested and enjoyed the cool afternoon in the forest. We deserve that rest. Late afternoon, we walked down the slope to the end point where we boarded the 2.5 tonner back to camp.

What started out with apprehension and worry turned out to be one of my most fun life experience ever. 4 days in a foreign forest. 3 nights in the cold. Beautiful views, nice people. It felt like a 4 day hiking trip. But then it was tiring and we also looked forward to be back in camp to have a good shower, cooked food and sleep in our bunks.

​NEXT WEEK : Exercise Warrior

Hello. In view of celebrating my enlistment anniversary on the 13th of June, I think it would be a good time to start blogging again. I have kind of settled down and adapt to this pandemic period and I have given up looking for a job so I guess I have more reasons to post regularly. I am planning to post an entry every Saturday morning so it can be something that you look forward to every weekend.

The last post was about my adventures at SISPEC ASLC. I promised to post on Taiwan next. Here it is. Have fun reading!

February 2001. It was winter in the northern hemisphere. It was also my first long flight out of Singapore. I cannot remember the time and date but it was at night when we checked in at Changi Airport. I was excited yet very apprehensive. I have never been away that far and that long in my life before. 4 hours on an SQ flight to Kaohsiung, Taiwan for exercise “Starlight”.

​When we arrived, it was already morning. I am slowly forgetting these memories so bear with me with all these estimations. I was very sure there was already daylight. 
​
We were told that all other Starlight participants will always alight at Kaohsiung and then head to this camp called Heng Chun Camp. But we are the lucky batch to go to a different camp. How lucky were we? I had no idea. We were told that we will be going to Puwei camp which I had no idea where. There weren't internet then and there and I really could not do any search or obtain any information. I was just following wherever they brought us to with no idea where we were and where we were going. Until today, I have no idea where Puwei camp is and where it is on Google Earth.

​The travelling time to Puwei camp is supposedly longer than to Heng Chun camp. We took a bus and even had lunch along the way. 1st meal in Taiwan. Me being picky, I really wondered what it would be. It was ok actually. Rice with soup, stewed fish, tofu and scrambled eggs. After the meal, we continued on the bus to Puwei.

​Upon reaching Puwei, it was already late afternoon. We checked in into this really cool camp. The premise reminded me of the setting in Ultraman TV series. Everything was grey. The city was grey. They buildings were grey. The skies were grey and this camp right smack in the middle of a town. It was not in some forested area. It was really in town. You would miss the main gate like it was a typical school along the road. Unfortunately I don't have photos of the exterior of the camp. Anyway you can go to street views in Taiwan counties. They all look the same. 

It was winter and as the sun sets, the weather became much cooler. Our first task was to check in into our bunks and get changed to our admin attire. After that, we had our first meal at Puwei camp. It was already dinner time. There was a halal cookhouse and I was very happy that the meals were actually very nice. At that time, there were cooks stationed in camps so the halal cookhouse had normal Singapore style halal cooked food. So yeah we still had rice and spicy meat and fish and vegetables. It was all normal. One guy from Bravo company brought a big tupperware of sambal ikan bilis. He thought that we were going to have bland meals throughout our stay there and brought sambal over. Since we were all surprised to have normal meals, he shared the sambal with everyone in the cookhouse. It was very funny and we all had a good laugh. “I thought we were going to eat soup everyday!” he said.

After that we all queued to use the telephones. There was a room with public phones arranged in rows on tables like an old fashion call centre. You can use either coins or phonecards to make calls. There was also a small booth that sold phonecards (Tien Hwa Ka) but it was already closed for the day. I cannot remember where we got our coins from but we all used coins that evening to call home. 

After that, it was all briefings and then we turned in for the night. I didn't have problem sleeping as the weather was cool and it was so nice to sleep even though the bunks were very crammed.

The next morning, we had our first morning exercise. The funny thing about this day that I can remember was, previously all of us will dread these morning exercises. But on that day, everyone was looking forward for it. Reason being, we were all so cold! We were freezing while we slept as dawn came. All of us walked quickly to the parade square and we really did our exercise with such energy so as to warm ourselves up. The funny part is the run. We always dread the run. But on this particular day, everyone were asking the sergeants to quickly finish up the basic exercises so that we can run. The moment our sergeants said, “Ok all form up for run, 10 rounds around the parade square!” we have already started sprinting around the square. Yes. We didn't just run. We sprinted! We were all so desperate to start perspiring.

The rest of the day were all administration duties and a lot of briefing about our 21 days stay in Taiwan. We had to collect our stuff such as sleeping bags, some military equipment and other stuff. We also got our uniforms. We were all given Taiwan uniforms to use during our stay. It also had our names in Chinese characters sewn on the right breast pocket. Mine had 2 characters and they are pronounced as “An Hua”. My buddy's name is Dzulkifly and his had 3 characters that are pronounced as “Chu Ke Fei”. Our Chinese friends said that it means “Pig Can Fly”. We all had a good laugh. At least they got the “Fly' in Dzulkifly right.

​Our first main event in Taiwan is a 5 days 4 nights uncontrolled navigation exercise. If you read the previous posts, we had another navigation exercise in Pulau Tekong. This time we are going to be thrown into the Taiwan wilderness and make our way back to the finishing line on our own. We were broken up into groups of 4. We were given our navigation equipment that includes 2 maps and 2 compasses per group. We had our navigational data sheet (NDS) and protractor per person. We were also given the Mean Grid Reference (MGR) of the checkpoints that we had to look for and plot them on our maps. If I can remember correctly, we were supposed to look for around 12 checkpoints within these 5 days with the last checkpoint being the finishing line and the ferry point to bring us back to camp. 

​It was very exciting for me as I really looked forward to walk and explore the terrains, views, countryside and the forests of Taiwan. Of course there was always this constant worry of getting lost or injured in the middle of nowhere but I guess the excitement and being very youthful made us more excited than worry. Anyway we also had safety and communications equipment and was already throughly briefed on various exercise procedures.

We spent the night planning our route for our exercise the next day. Remember, we had no internet and none of us (except the commanders) have ever set foot on the terrain. We better not get lost. We better bring enough food, yet we better not carry unnecessary weight on our shoulders. 

Tomorrow morning we will be off into a new terrain, a new wilderness, experiencing winter for the first time in my life.


NEXT WEEK : Exercise Longstride

I've kept this experience to myself. Maybe I have shared it to some close friends. I remember sharing it to Fadhlur during one of my rehearsals and he said he was inspired by it and used it for some pitching. And then a few weeks ago, I shared it to the Wan Belantara cast members and Eli said, "I would watch this movie." So maybe I can share it here because there were responses in my IG poll that people want to read short stories.


So this happened in the year 1997 and lasted for a year plus. 


Back then, I was studying in a school in Tampines. There was no bus service 969 then, so I had to take the train from Yishun to City Hall and changed to the eastbound train and alighted at Bedok where then I took bus service 69 to school.


Everyday, my classes started at 9am and so I always leave home and board the train at the same time everyday. 


I think it is pretty common for many commuters, if you notice, that when you board the train at the same timing everyday, you will see the same people everytime. So it is the same for me. I will always see the same people at the same time. If I didn't see them, it means that I was either late or early.

So every morning when I was on my way to school, there will always be this one girl who boarded the train at Ang Mo Kio. Not small girl la.. she was about the same age as me. I was 17 that year. We will then be in the same train all the way to City Hall, board the eastbound train to Bedok, board the same bus number 69 to school and only then we will part ways. I will turn left to School of IT and Applied Science while she would walk straight to School of Business. That was pretty much it. I only saw her during the commute. I don't remember seeing her in school at all.


So this went on for 1.5 years. Until when I was in the middle part of Year 2. 


Same thing everyday. Same person. Same girl boards at Ang Mo Kio. All the way to school. It was the same that it just felt routine. We never smiled to each other. We never acknowledged each other. We just know that we are in the same train and heading towards the same direction.

So one day 1.5 years later, like as per normal, we board the southbound train to City Hall. Upon reaching City Hall, we transferred to the eastbound train along with many others on the platform. The teenagers at that time will always board the last cabin so automatically we would be at the first cabin heading to Bedok. I cannot remember who sat first. There were a lot of people in the cabin but there were also a few seats. I only remember that by the time we were at Lavender, we were seating beside each other. That was the closest I've been physically to her, but still we were just commuters and minding our own business.


Somehow... just somehow... as the train reached Kallang, everyone in the cabin alighted. Everyone. There were still people in other cabins but the cabin we were in was empty. Of my 1.5 years commuting to school, this was the first time it happened. 


So it was just me and her somewhere in the middle of an empty cabin, sitting beside each other. 


Different people would have different reaction. Mine was... awkward. What am I suppose to do? Should I say hi? Would that be creepy? Should I move away to sit on another seat? Will that be offensive? I really didn't know what to do. We have seen each other everyday for the past year and this was the first time we were sitting beside each other. In an MRT cabin, in Kallang, heading towards Bedok, at 8:15am. 


Well, I just kept quiet. I really didn't know what to do. 


The train moved on. To Aljunied, no one boarded. To Paya Lebar, no one boarded. It was the longest ride between the 3 stations ever. To Eunos, one auntie boarded and sat across us. She had to sit across us. That I don't understand also. We were sitting beside each other not talking to each other and this auntie sat across us. She looked at us and smiled. We both smiled at her but we didn't interact to each other. I had strong belief at that time that the auntie thought we were a quarrelling couple.


We alighted at Bedok, and our differing walking paces separated us. We walked to the interchange. We boarded the same 69 bus. We alighted at the same bus stop. She headed to her School of Business and I took the left turn to my school. That was an awkward commute but interesting. Maybe tomorrow I will smile at her. Maybe....


Only but...... there was no tomorrow. 


She wasn't in the train. She didn't board the train or maybe she was in another cabin. But even if she was in another cabin, I would see her at Bedok. But I didn't. Maybe she was on MC or something.


I didn't see her the next day. And the next day. And the day after. And the week after. 


Basically, that fateful day was the last time I saw her. 1.5 years of my 3 years of education, I saw her everyday and after that day, I didn't see her again. And I still have 1.5 years of school left. Even if she was older or graduating, she couldn't have just disappeared in the middle of the semester?


So yes, that is the story. I saw her everyday. One day she sat beside me on an eastbound train. The next day I don't see her anymore. I found it strange but it wasn't a phenomenon that haunted me. It was just a commuting experience. 


I told this to my mother many years later and she said, those happenings are "jodoh". God put us there for sometime. Finally God put us beside each other. But we didn't take the chance. So the chance ended and God put us away on other paths. Cool insight. But what was more intriguing was, she just disappeared.
​

Anyway, I did see her again. 7 years later. In 2006. I was working at a little children arts school. She sent her baby girl for a trial class in the school. She came with her husband. Way better looking than me. I recognised her, I am not sure if she recognised me. That trial class was about 45 minutes long. She was with her husband and her child throughout that class. The class ended and they left.


And for real this time... I haven't seen her yet ever since.












Well... this story may not be for everyone but I hope you enjoyed it :)

I wrote this 11 years ago. In an old blog. In a defunct "Multiply" account. I thought it is worth revisiting. 

At that time I was a happier person, so I wrote sombre yet happy stories. I really don't know if this story is appropriate now. Maybe now it would be considered racist or insensitive or something... I really don't know because everything seems to be wrong now. 

But back then in 2009, this story was well liked that people asked me to write a sequel about it. 

In 2009, the Chinese 7th Month (Hungry Ghost Month) and Ramadhan started on the same night. The believers believe that during these months, souls are released from wherever they are believed to be. 

This year, the 7th month coincides with the new month of Muharram which also means the new Islamic year. I hope you will enjoy this short story.

My first publication. My last throw of the dice. BACALAH comprises of two "post-modern" and "absurdist" scripts ; "AL-IMAN" & "CLAUSTROPHOBIA". 

I cannot say that the pricing is based on all the time spent researching, thinking, writing and editing the scripts over many months, as that would be considered "unquantifiable".
​
Without any support, benefactors and sponsors, I can only say that the price of the book is enough to cover the printing and delivery charges, plus 1 Mcdonalds meal. 


Throughout the years, I realise many people I meet, schools, even practitioners, confuses theatre with drama. I want to say that "drama" is a kind of theatre performance and there are many other types of performances under the "umbrella" of a "theatre show".


And personally, I do not like drama performances and I hardly write drama scripts. Even when I do, I will not write in in a template drama formula. Maybe if one day I have my own playwright sharing session or a play writing class, I can explain the differences to you and also share why I personally dislike drama scripts.


Therefore my 1st publication, with the title inspired by the 1st Qur'an verse, I hope it will be a revelation to all about the differences and the variation of theatre stage play scripts. There are more interesting concepts in theatre than just drama. 


Thank you so much for the support. BACALAH is a sold out within 36 hours of announcement. I didn't expect that truthfully.


As I still have requests for the books, I will do a 2nd printing, which is suppose to arrive very soon. Once I have received the reprints, it will go back on sale ok? 


Do keep a lookout for the reprint and share it with your friends. 


And also to keep you and myself excited, I am going to publish 3 more titles within this year. A compilation of drama scripts, period plays and ensemble plays. 


Thank you for the support again and I am very excited for the reprint and upcoming titles!

The year 1990. I was 10 years old. I was waiting for the feeder bus service number 802 to go for my madrasah classes at Masjid Darul Makmur. While I waited for the bus, I saw a new thing on the bus stop notice board. It was very new. And I was excited.


It was a map of Yishun showing bus routes. There were not much details. Just a road map. 


For as long as I can remember, I was obsessed with maps. I love maps very much. Remember there was no internet then. If I wanted to look at maps, I would have to go the library and look for atlas or globes. My father used to bring home planner books every year and there will be a map of the world in it. I would look at it and memorise the maps. That being said, there would only be maps of the world or maps of Asia. Anything smaller than that would be hard to find. But here, at the bus stop, there was a map of Yishun! How much smaller can it be? I kept looking at it in awe and memorised it. Every time I took a bus at the bus stop, I would look even more to remember more details to be memorised. 


I would then draw them on foolscap paper. I had a classmate. His name was Azmi. He was a sucker for maps too and we would compete with each other to draw the best looking maps. As accurate as possible, with as much details as possible.

Here, I try to replicate the drawing that I did then when I first saw the map. I remember I quickly drew it in case it faded from my memory. Madrasah classes were easy to me at that time so I spent that day drawing this map. Before I would forget the details.


Yishun New Town, as how it was called then, were separated into "Neighbourhoods". Each neighbourhood was colour coded. 


Neighbourhood 1 = Green
Neighbourhood 2 = Yellow
Neighbourhood 3 = Orange
Neighbourhood 4 = Purple
The mysterious Neighbourhood 5 = Dark blue. (It was a mystery then because that area was just forest. So I assumed that they were going to build flats there. They finally did after 2010)
Neighbourhood 6 = Light blue
Neighbourhood 7 = Brown (Yucks. I was annoyed that they used brown for my neighbourhood. I would love the pink.)
Neighbourhood 8 = Grey
Neighbourhood 9 = Pink


The block numbers in the neighbourhood will start with that particular number. ie. Neighbourhood 1 = Block number 100 onwards. Neighbourhood 2 = block 200 onwards. Though not all neighbourhoods have a hundred blocks.  


And then as I observed the map, I realised a few patterns. Only when I was much older with accessible internet, then I would be able to prove it to people. At that time, when I told adults of my "discovery", they didn't believe me and they said it was just random order.


Singapore's HDB estates are designed poorly. There are no straight lines with no explanations whatsoever. The roads curve randomly and without any good reason. The worse design to me would be Hougang. The neighbourhoods splatter everywhere. Tampines comes next. The minor roads lead to nowhere with random turns that would have saved space if they would just go straight. I have no explanation to the mess in the estate designs. It is disturbing to me but I still cannot find an explanation.


Nevertheless, within this mess, there is this simple order that I realised. 


ONE. Street numbers. The street numbers are all assigned according to the neighbourhoods. For example, neighbourhood 1 will have streets such as Street 11, Street 12, Street 13, etc. Neighbourhood 2 will have street numbers such as Street 21, 22, 23 etc. Neighbourhood 3, Street 31, 32, 33, etc.


TWO. Avenues. Pasir Ris uses "Drive" instead of "Avenues" but they are arranged the same way. 


When you study Geography, you will learn about "Latitudes" and "Longitudes". Latitudes are grid numbers going East to West while Longitudes are grid numbers going North to South. I realise the avenues are arranged in that way. Let's make it simpler with just "Horizontal" and "Vertical" lines. 


If you look at HDB maps, and you place "North" on top (supposedly quite naturally),


Odd number avenues would be placed horizontally, while even number avenues would be arranged vertically.
​

That is how it is supposed to be but like I said, I don't know why HDB estates are designed horrendously, therefore the roads are not straight horizontal or straight vertical. 


Ok so that is something I would like to share if it gives you some knowledge in this "GENERAL KNOWLEDGE" series! I remember sharing this to a girl in a school I taught. She was in Secondary 2 in a "clever school". And then she said to me, "how is that a good information and beneficial to anyone when we all use GPS now?" I was a bit sad. But she was from a clever school while I was from a neighbourhood school in Yishun neighbourhood 1, so I guess she should be cleverer than me. I didn't say that we didn't have GPS in 1990 so I guess I am irrelevant. 


Well maybe if you are a map geek like me, you would enjoy this info! But then again if you're a map geek, you would have already know this. 


Ok then.... it was fun to me at least.

The last Gen X or the first Gen Y. Whatever it is, it was a tricky period of time. 


I was born when this country was on the beginning of technological modernisation. I was alive when the Malay word "Canggih" was invented. It was a very exciting time to be born. And thus, when we were small children, we were seen as the luckiest people to be born in this country ever. Economic stability, peace and prosperity, bright future, no wars, low crime. We were supposed to have a very exciting life ahead of us.


The teachers and older folks looked at us in envy. They call us lucky. 


And with that, they told us to have ambitions and dreams and work hard for them and we can achieve. 


We can achieve..... we can achieve....


There is something down the road that we can strive for
We are told no dream's too bold that we can't try for
There's a spirit in the air, it's a feeling we all share
We're going to build a better life, for you and me
We can achieve, we can achieve


So I had dreams. I had ambitions. And yes, I worked for them. 


I had ambitions to be a traveller, a photographer, a librarian, an astronaut, a researcher, a curator. I wanted to be in the field of History, Geography, Anthropology, Astronomy, Etymology, Archaeology. 


But I couldn't be any of them even when I tried. They are all not Singapore jobs. My dreams and ambitions are not supported here. Go look at the jobs list. It's all sales sales sales business business business and more money. 


So what happened to dreams and ambitions? 


They are all lies.


Not that I didn't try. I did. I had belief. 


The only job close enough to my dream that is achievable, is the library. But I cannot be a librarian because I don't have a university degree. Even a few months ago I applied to be an associate librarian, hoping that my age and experiences could be of some help, I got rejected. A clear rejection email.


The only thing I had left was the arts. It wasn't my first choice but it looked achievable. I wanted to become an actor, director, playwright. I worked hard for a good 20 years to master the craft. But now at 40 years old and I cannot even buy a simple 2 room HDB flat, it is obviously a fail. A failed choice. Being too old to change a life choice, I deduce I had a failed life. 


So now I am just going to live my remaining life in peace and without ambitions or dreams and wait for my time to end. 


And I look back at the things that I dreamt and wanted to achieve. 


I shall do them without having any hopes of being successful or making a living out of it. 


So here we have the PHOTOGRAPHY SERIES! 


I wanted to be a travel photographer and get paid taking photographs of sceneries and animals and architecture and stuff. You know those things. I will take more when I have the time. These photos were taken with my old camera the Nikon D50 and D300. The photo quality is not as good as current cameras. But it doesn't matter. I had fun. I hope you will have fun too. 


Here are some photographs of animals in Singapore (of course mostly are in the zoo) and as I pretended to be a wildlife photographer. 

More of these photos are posted in this facebook album. Have fun looking! You can use them too.

https://www.facebook.com/anwarhadiphotographs/media_set/?set=a.1715856458555283

I have a folder with pictures of various places like this. I used to want to make it a lifelong hobby, until I realise that cameras have shelf lives and they deteriorate with time. The fungi and moulds don't help either. I thought, these photos can be used as reference for the future. This was when I thought that there would be such thing as a "future". 

The folder is named "Sights Of Singapore". As mentioned in the previous post, these are sights that I wished I could draw but I cannot. So I capture them with my camera instead.

One interesting thing that I used to do is editing photos to look like miniatures. It was harder to do then, but you can do them easily now with photo editing apps such as Snapseed. 

Simple aerial photos, a bit of blurring, and then they look like toys. Try it when you have the time.